the start

i wanted to start this new writing with something like, well, this is my first journal/blog/whatever and i don’t know what to write.  
But that sounds so…. typical, and who the hell wants to be typical.  my last wish is that i’m gonna start writing and sound like some emo teen wearing skinny jeans moaning about not knowing what to moan about.
So instead i still sound like the above, just actively aware and trying to fight it.
the olympics are on, and i don’t think I have ever been less interested in the olympics, I mean whats different, phelps swims fast and bolt runs fast.  China and the US duke it out for the top spot and the rest of the world is just happy to have a good time, except for Britain, they have this illusion of grandeur when the fact is there are only 60 million people in this country and statistically they just won’t beat a much larger country.  and i’m pretty sure India isn’t up there because they’re smart enough not to throw all that money at evolutionary traits that aren’t useful anymore.  granted they probably spend that money on other just as useless causes, but at least not at that one.
I’m tempted to delete the above writing because i feel like i’m trying too hard, but i read somewhere once that writing gets easier with practice so i’m going to leave bad observations in for the time being.
I can’t decide whether i’m going to publish any of these anywhere.  There is something cool about a blog, if people read it.  if no one reads it, its just lame.  actually, a blog only makes sense if there are lots of people to read it, or if its for family, but if its just for family why not just email it.
on the plus side, i once again have a use for my journaling program.  i did use it for university, i was supposed to keep a learning journal, i hated it.  i liked the program, but the learning journals sucked, they always wanted lots of reflections.  
have you ever known one of those people who always asks, “and how do you feel about that”.  I hate that, and thats what reflection is like.  i see life much more black and white.  no, i take that back, my views on things are very black and white.  
alright here is a disclaimer, if by chance i do post this to a blog and you read this, i work with adults with special needs and my learning journals where about my work, the course was a practice based course.
right back to my thoughts on black and white.  i would write a learning journal and comment on how i noticed X approach worked better for Bob (obviously a fake name) than using the Y approach and i would say it was because of factors a, b and c.  In my learning journal I’m then supposed to explain how this was for me…..  How in hell does that have anything to do with how i’m feeling.  if i tried Y approach and it didn’t work i don’t reflect on it, i make a mental note that, oh, that wasn’t the best choice, that might have been because of ______, i will try approach X next time.  its that simple, but i was somehow supposed to make more of it, and to this day, i still don’t know how.
i told myself to write 600 words, so have a good night everyone.

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